Saturday
Sometimes the evening reruns are in the same slot as the weekday, and that's pretty much been the case since they brought M*A*S*H out of the vault along with the complete series on VHS in case you have a spare closet to store all the seasons.
Hawkeye is counseling Radar when the phone rings, Nick answers in his room since he has an idea.
"So you're alive?"
"Yeah better just not motivated." He had done some desk stuff earlier to the tune of several code conversations that faded in and out, copied some but mostly had it on for company. Finally won his fourth hand of solitaire and messed with the modem some.”
"It's the weekend babe. Were you watching Simpsons?"
"M*A*S*H."
"Oh I always forget those are back on, my parents never missed, man I was a senior when they did the big ending, that's all we talked about."
"I remember them pulling down tents I think."
"Probably not as big of a deal in, what, sixth?"
"Was more into Happy Days."
"Oh yeah, (tauntingly) Jenn-nny Picc-a-lo."
"Bill-lee Aye-dolll."
"Oh bite it Swanson."
"Bear it."
"Be a good boy and rest up and we'll see..."
"Actually..."
Pauses. "Everything OK?"
"Yeah, just seems...dunno..." and she waits patiently for him to collect his thoughts. He sighs. "I have access to such great....you know."
"Ummm..."
"Like this past week, we totally did it all."
"Well, not...all."
"Yeah not technically, but it seems, I dunno, I have it too good, if that makes sense."
Longer pause. "You just made my day sweetie."
Nick didn't know what to say so just let it float.
She sighs. "Nick...we've each had some rough patches, time in the wilderness -"
"I know."
"Sometimes it's like this, but the future is uncertain, I'll be busier in coming months, you may be too, we'll have to plan our time...are you thinking of teaching?"
"Actually more tempted to do more student-ing."
"Wow, great, which degree?"
"Prolly comp sci."
"God you're a nerd."
"You teach Chaucer."
"You know the drill, pick a cheek and pucker, sucker."
"Howbout just that for half an hour."
"You are killing me. I'd settle for just a quiet bath."
"Like that one night?"
"Umm, no, that was a LOUD bath - AHEM - nice as that was..."
"And jazz."
"And jazz."
"We need a project."
"You know I think we do."
"Wanna do a song?"
"Funny you should say that..."
"Should I laugh?"
"Just look in the mirror. Alright, ever heard that Zeppelin, it's about, lemme try - " Clears her throat, "I SAID I GOT A LITTLE WOMAN AND SHE WON'T BE TRUE," with a decent falsetto, not that Nick knows that word yet.
He has to set the phone on the bed until he can stop laughing.
"You there? You ballentine PRICK are you LAUGHING?" She switches to Cockney, "I'll slit yew up a treat f'this!"
"Oh honey..."
"Honey my other cheek, do you know that one or you yankin' my wank?"
"OH yeah, rock radio played the hell out of it a couple years ago, box set extra track I think. And I thought you weren’t into Led Zepp."
"Did I say that? Must have been a mood, but I love to sing like Plant. So if you can keep your hands out of your pants I can show you the chords and I'll play bass."
"Or teach me the bass part."
Silence.
"OK I better learn the chords."
"Yes you better."
"And you'll learn the words."
"You know what, I think you got a little TOO much rest the past couple days."
"Wanna make some music tomorrow?"
"Call me in the morning."
"I'd rather call you Sweet Cheeks."
"Howbout this - we each soak tonight with some jazz?"
"I think that can be arranged."
"Just watch out for tadpoles."
"Hey how'd you know about-"
"Gunnite, love you." And like a pro she doesn't give him any more chances.
He gets his soak in before SNL starts and digs out his acoustic to try and warm up the hands.